⚠️ CHAOTIC DISASTER ENERGY WARNING ⚠️
This page contains:

• Heavy addiction & self-destructive themes
• Mental health struggles (ADHD, autism, depression, etc.)
• Blunt/dark humor & emotional dysregulation
• Gross habits (dermatillomania, cannibalistic impulses)
• Violence references, gore obsession, weapons
• Self-harm behaviors & disturbing content

Just a tired, chaotic caracal being an absolute trainwreck. Fiction (fursona), but real vibes if you're sensitive to this stuff.
Jared profile

Jared

Age: 19 | December 5

Jared full body Custom personal vibe 1 Custom personal vibe 2 Custom personal vibe 2 Custom personal vibe 2 Custom personal vibe 2

Physical Description

Species
Caracal
Height
170 cm (5'7")
Weight
54 kg - bony, fragile frame
Build
Lean, undernourished, sharp angles
Fur Condition
Scruffy, patchy, unwashed
Distinctive Feature
Permanent saliva trickle at mouth

Face: Tired amber eyes with permanent dark circles that look bruised. His pupils are often dilated from substances or sleep deprivation. Scruffy tufted ears that twitch nervously. A sharp, predatory grin that doesn't reach his eyes. The corners of his mouth constantly pool with saliva— it's just there, always, a thin yellowish trickle that he occasionally wipes away with the back of his hand, leaving crusty stains on his fur.

Body: Skeletal and malnourished-looking, with visible ribs when he stretches. His arms and hands are covered in layers of scars — healed bite marks, scratch marks, picked scabs, self-inflicted cuts. Fingers yellowed from nicotine, nails bitten down to the quick and often bloody. Shaky hands that steady when he lights a cigarette.

Posture: Perpetually slouched, shoulders hunched forward like he's trying to make himself smaller. Leans against walls, doorframes, anything vertical. When standing still, he shifts weight from foot to foot anxiously. Hands always in pockets or fidgeting with something.

Scent: A nauseating mixture of stale tobacco smoke, weed, unwashed clothes, old sweat, vomit, and occasionally cheap soap from when he actually showers (rare). The smell announces him before he enters a room.

Backstory & Hygiene Struggles

Jared's life as a perpetual squatter stems from his deep-seated depression and aversion to structure, leading him to drift from one abandoned building to another, crashing wherever he can find a semi-sheltered spot like derelict warehouses or forgotten urban ruins that reek of decay and neglect, which only amplifies his deplorable hygiene since he rarely has access to running water or clean facilities, and even when he does, his overwhelming apathy and emotional exhaustion make the simple act of showering feel like an insurmountable task, a pointless ritual in a world that already feels filthy and unforgiving, so he just lets the grime build up layer by layer as a twisted armor against his inner turmoil, preferring the raw authenticity of his unkempt state over the vulnerability of trying to "clean up" and face the void inside.

Jared (he/him) - Transmasc/Agender man

Diseases & Troubles

  • Trichotillomania
  • Dermatillomania
  • Depression
  • Rabies
  • Diogenes syndrome
  • AuDHD (Autism + ADHD)
  • Anxiety
  • Derealization / Dissociation episodes

Hygiene

Cannot shower due to extreme fear of water caused by rabies.
Smell: …you really don’t want to know.

Habitat

Homeless.
Sleeps in abandoned buildings, under bridges, or directly inside dumpsters.
Favorite sleeping spot: inside a dumpster.

Addictions

  • Nicotine
  • Weed
  • Caffeine

Graphic Content Warning

(Contains heavy themes of illness, self-neglect, and graphic living conditions)

Fun Facts

  • Most of his clothes are handmade — he sewed some of his own pants and his kilt himself. At least he's not naked.
  • The colored patches of fur are from the day he accidentally spilled dye all over himself.
  • He drools constantly because of the rabies.
  • He once ate a moldy kebab… and actually liked it.
  • He makes an incredible amount of noise while walking because of all the chains he wears.
  • Punk through and through. His punk name is Dipstick.

Childhood (Ages 0–12)

Born in a decaying industrial town in northern France — rusting factories, gray skies, families barely scraping by. Parents were young, overwhelmed, and deeply dysfunctional: dad drank himself numb after losing his factory job, mom worked endless night shifts and self-medicated with whatever pills she could get. Home was a cramped apartment that always smelled of stale smoke and unwashed dishes.

Showed signs of AuDHD early — couldn't sit still, melted down over tags in clothes, overwhelmed by every sound and light. School was hell. Teachers called him "disruptive," classmates called him weird. Started pulling out his hair (trichotillomania) around age 7, leaving bald patches he hid under hoodies. By 9 he was picking at his skin until it bled (dermatillomania), convinced every bump was a flaw he had to destroy.

Found small escapes: stealing safety pins and chains from mom's old punk zines, doodling anarchy symbols, listening to bootleg cassettes of The Exploited and Crass on a broken Walkman. Knew even then he didn't feel right in his body — too soft, too wrong — but no words for it yet.

Teenage Years (Ages 13–19)

Things fell apart fast. At 14, dad left for good. Mom spiraled harder. Jared started skipping school, hanging with older street punks who squatted in abandoned warehouses. They gave him his first real name: Dipstick — because he was always "dipping" into trouble, and because the constant drooling from his later rabies made it literal and permanent.

Came out as transmasc at 18. Mom reacted with confusion and anger; no money for hormones or binders. Started binding with duct tape (bad idea), cutting his hair with kitchen scissors, wearing oversized hoodies and patched-up pants he sewed himself on a stolen machine. Clothes became armor — ripped jeans turned into kilts, safety pins everywhere, chains dangling from every belt loop so he rattled like a ghost when he walked.

Mental health worsened: depression sank in, anxiety made every day feel like broken glass. Dissociation/derealization episodes started — whole days where the world felt fake. Self-medicated with cheap nicotine, weed, energy drinks (caffeine).

At 17 got bitten by a stray dog during a squat eviction. Bite got infected, no doctor. Weeks later symptoms hit: fever, paranoia, constant drooling, terror of water. Rabies. Too late for treatment. Virus settled in his brain, turning fear into a living thing. Can't shower anymore — water feels like acid. Smells like rot, sweat, weed, and unwashed clothes.

How He Ended Up Homeless (Ages 19–Present)

Mom kicked him out at 19 after one too many fights. "You're not my son anymore," she said. Left with a backpack, sewing kit, a few zines, and his chains.

Tried couch-surfing with punk friends, but rabies made him unpredictable — drooling, twitching, freaking out at running water. People got scared. Doors closed. Squats got raided. Eventually stopped trying to stay inside.

Now drifts between abandoned buildings, underpasses, and his favorite spot: inside dumpsters. The smell doesn't bother him. It's warm, dark, safe from the rain. Curls up on cardboard and old blankets, chains clinking softly as he sleeps.

Still sews when he can — patches colorful scraps onto his clothes (the neon dye stains are from a bottle he knocked over while drunk). Eats whatever he finds: dumpster kebabs (moldy ones included — he genuinely liked the taste), half-eaten fast food.

Diogenes syndrome has taken root: hoards random junk — broken lighters, bottle caps, bits of chain — because throwing things away feels like losing parts of himself. Chains make him loud as hell when he walks, announcing his presence like a warning.

Where He Lives Now

Settled in the suburbs, sleeping under a bridge most nights. It's his current "home" — concrete pillars, graffiti-covered walls, the constant hum of traffic overhead. He’s got a little nest there: cardboard, stolen blankets, a pile of empty energy drink cans, and his chains draped over a rusted railing like decoration. The bridge keeps the rain off (mostly), and the dumpster nearby is a good backup when it gets too cold or wet.

Graphic Content Warning

(Contains heavy themes of illness, self-neglect, graphic living conditions, mental health struggles, and chronic disease)

Fun Facts

  • Most of his clothes are handmade — he sewed some of his own pants and his kilt himself. At least he's not naked.
  • The colored patches of fur are from the day he accidentally spilled dye all over himself.
  • He drools constantly because of the rabies — it's why "Dipstick" fits so perfectly.
  • He once ate a moldy kebab… and actually liked it.
  • Makes an incredible amount of noise while walking because of all the chains he wears.
  • Punk through and through — screams lyrics into empty alleys at 3 a.m., shares his last cigarette with other gutter rats, and believes the system deserves to burn.

Outfit & Accessories

🧢 What Jared Wears Daily 🧢
🧢
Fred Durst Red Yankees Cap
Worn backwards, sweat-stained brim, never leaves his head even when sleeping. It's practically fused to his skull.
👕
Oversized Band T-Shirt
Usually Bloodhound Gang or similar trash bands. Stained (food, vomit, unknown substances). Holes in the collar from nervous chewing. Size XL on his small frame.
👖
Baggy Cargo Pants or Ripped Jeans
Sagging low on his hips, held up by a worn belt. Pockets stuffed with random objects. Cuffs torn and dragging on the ground.
👟
Beat-Up Sneakers / Combat Boots
Untied laces, soles wearing through, dried mud caked on sides. Sometimes mismatched socks visible (if he's wearing socks at all).
🧥
Ratty Zip-Up Hoodie (Optional)
Faded black or dark green. Zipper broken. Hood always up when worn, hiding his face. Smells worse than everything else combined.
💿 Items Jared Always Carries 💿
One Fierce Beer Coaster CD
One Fierce Beer Coaster CD
Bloodhound Gang. His most prized possession. Scratched to hell but still plays. Carried in left jacket pocket always.
Fred Durst Hat
Fred Durst Yankees Hat
THE hat. Red, backwards, iconic. Part of his identity. Would rather die than take it off.
Pocket Knife
Folding Pocket Knife
Small, sharp, handle worn smooth. Used for picking scabs, carving into things, self-harm. Always in right front pocket.
Tobacco
Tobacco

Appearance & Physical Quirks

Scruffy ears, tired eyes, sharp grin. Always looks half-awake, half-feral. Dark circles permanently etched in, saliva pooling at mouth corners, shaky hands when sober.

  • Fingers/arms covered in healed scabs & bite marks
  • Chews on random shit without noticing (fingers, sleeves, plastic, paper)
  • Smells like tobacco, weed, stale rooms, smoke & cheap soap
  • Slouches constantly, hands in pockets, leans on walls like too tired to exist
  • Eye contact comes and goes; voice low/soft, laughs through nose

Personality

INFP-T — Feelings everywhere, words nowhere

Blunt, socially off, no filter. Laughs at wrong moments, hates people but gets weirdly attached/jealous/clingy. Oscillates between self-hatred and "i’m hot actually". Dry, trashy, dark humor. Acts mean as defense.

Loser older brother energy — gross but weirdly charismatic. Can’t talk "normally", overthinks then self-sabotages. Sensitive & lonely underneath the feral mess.

"i hate everyone but if you leave i'll be sad about it for weeks"

Habits & Addictions

Runs on nicotine/caffeine, forgets to eat, chronically tired. Smokes rolled cigarettes constantly, weed to slow brain, drinks when emotions loud.

  • Stalks people online out of boredom/curiosity
  • Scratches/picks/bites own skin absentmindedly
  • Hords useless objects
  • Watches gore but dosen't feel anything about it
  • Listens to extreme/trash music way too loud
  • Addicted to chaos, validation from specific people, internet rabbit holes, self-destructive routines

Mental Health & Struggles

  • ADHD, autism, depression, anxiety
  • Dyslexia, dysgraphia, dysphasia, Trichotillomania, dermatillomanie
  • Dissociation, derealization episodes
  • Hypersexuality, impulse control issues
  • Sensory processing disorder, emotional dysregulation, rejection sensitivity
  • Addiction-prone personality

Health stuff: body lags behind brain, emotionally exhausted.

Likes & Dislikes

Likes

  • Trash music & extreme noise that drowns thoughts
  • YTP content
  • Liminal spaces & empty places
  • Late night walks
  • Sushi
  • Being left alone but not abandoned
  • Being understood without explaining
  • Late night walks (or urbex crawls)

Dislikes

  • Authority & being told what to do
  • Moral superiority & forced positivity
  • People assuming things about him
  • Silence when brain won’t shut up

Extra Vibes

Anti-authoritarian, anti-fascist. Doesn’t believe in redemption arcs but wants one anyway. Looks dangerous but mostly just sad and defensive.

How people see him: intimidating, cold, fucked up.
Reality: sensitive, lonely, attaches too easily, scared of being unwanted.

"i'm fine lol (lying)"

"i'm literally decaying in real time but at least i look hot while doing it (lying, i look like shit)"

"touch me and i'll bite your hand off... wait no pls touch me i'm touch starved af"

"everyone's a bitch including me especially me"

"life is a dumpster fire and i'm the gasoline 😮‍💨"